Junior Seau is like Brett Favre, but Less Douchey

Casting aside the unnecessary media frenzy and John Kerry-like flip-flopping, Junior Seau is un-retiring (or "graduating," as he calls it) for the umpteenth time. Straight up.

Seau, known for his world-famous piggyback rides, obliges for an Abigail Breslin look-alike

Seau returns, as he seemingly does every year, to provide the Patriot's defense intangibles like old age (experience), a USC presence (winner's mentality) and a never-quit attitude (third un-retiring). In no way is this a reactionary move by the Pats after being torched for 330 yards by the formidable Kyle Orton.