Dick Vitale Writes?! :About the Big 11?

For those who have never heard of Fire Joe Morgan, then you should be ashamed. They created a blog just for the act of reading between the lines of poorly written baseball stories. Since they have shut down and moved on to bigger things, there has been a hole in the blogosphere for readers to revel in the idiocrocy that is mediocre sports writing. Doing my part to fix this, I have decided to take up where they left off, and give Dick Vitale what he has been needing for a long time -- someone to bring him down to earth.

Today's Article: Big 10 looks to build prestige.

Wilt Stilts in blue.

Dick Vitale in BOLD BABY!

You go, CBS wire services!

After Drew Brees made the Patriots' secondary look more helpless than the Japanese on August 6, 1945, I've had to settle for the little victories. Victories like watching the game on mute and evading the mind-numbing drivel that (I assume) spilled out of Jaws' and Gruden's lips like saliva on a stroke victim. I also enjoyed the company of my father and downed a few exotic beers at the Yardhouse.

After returning home and perusing the stat sheet, which only led to further depression, I came across a great line in CBS Sportsline's game recap. In comparing the Patriots' defeats to the remaining unbeaten NFL teams, the article read: