Closeout sales at Gil's

IF YOU THOUGHT OUR SALES WERE BANNANAS LAST TIME, THEN YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS SHIT.

Solve that problem with some brand new NIGHT VISION GOGGLES at GILBERT'S GUN GARAGE.

EVERYTHING MUST GO AT GGG's LOCKED UP-STRAP UP SALE!

Hey, It's Gil, and I need to evacuate these weapons like Haiti residents. Hurry and get a lightly used glock WITH THE SERIAL NUMBERS SCRAPED OFF . It's virtually undetectable.

And check this out

Our GYM BAG SPECIAL. Pick and choose your three favorite guns, toss 'em in the bag like Fabolous and YOU'RE PREPARED FOR THE CRAPS TOURNAMENT.

Hey, take it from me, these deals are crazier than Flip Saunder's 1-1-1-1-1-1-1 zone idea. I currently scheduled plans to leave the country and THESE GUNS MUST GO!

How bout this fine specimen.

Bought this off a retired KGB agent, and the glove box is STUFFED WITH VODKA! That's real drunk driving Donte Stallworth.

Need some proof of insurance?

THIS SHOULD DO THE JOB.

Can't get statistically get an A in that tough Calc 900001 class?

Looks like your final just improved to a 190%. THAT'S DOUBLE AA.

Just come on in to my GUN GARAGE, and find yourself a deal like I find my shot, ALL DAY LONG!

(All sales are final, and we don't condone use of Gilbert's guns on police and professors)