Chase Mejia Devouring the Internetz like Miami Pussy

Wow, and you thought daredorm.com couldn't get any sexier. Chase Mejia is MILDLY HOT by himself. Well, at least according to Google Trends. He's so hot, he was at 17th at one point on google's rankings.

Somewhat surprisingly, Mejia hasn't embraced his renewed notoriety. Just hours after the story appeared on the Perm, Mejia asked for its removal:

From Mejia:

[sic] Hello I saw the recent Blog u wrote about Chase Mejia and that just happens to be me. Id really aprecciate it if you took this blog down please. You do not know any of the details. I did the video as a one time thing to make money to get back into school and pay for it. My mom lost her job and dad will not help me out. I have to get my grades back in order to get back on the field and im really overwhelmed right now just from this as it is with people calling me. Please take it down I still have a future and dreams. Do the right thing please. Thank you and God bless you! Best wishes

So please, if you read this and have Chase's contact info, stop calling. It's awfully hard to concentrate on midterms when you're constantly being interrupted by hundreds of friends and fans congratulating you on your sexcapades.

[EDIT]: Apparently there was also some misinformation in the previous Mejia post regarding his reasoning behind leaving Northern Illinois. Mejia allegedly left in the midst of theft accusations, not because of the NIU shootings. Forgive me for trying to maintain the man's immaculate public image.

GObama, Tell Denmark Who They're Daddy is

When most people think of Copenhagen, they think of ruff ridin' douchebag cowboys who don't recognize that half their lip has disintegrated into a black swollen mess of tobacco. What does Obama think of Copenhagen? OLYMPICS.

This Friday, the committee that oversees the location of the 2016 Olympics will make their decision on where that bad boy will be. Chicago is in the running, and being the former Senator from Illinois and friend of the Windy City, Obama has a willingness to bring the Olympics back to the US. He's planning a trip to use his unrelenting personal speaking ability to force their hand. Of course, he could just enact an embargo against Denmark til we get what we want. Isn't that what we do as Americans? *cough*MichaelCrabtree*cough*.

But why waste the time? We are losing our stranglehold on the world, and that world we all expect to be there in seven years wont be around in three. Unless you're looking for an Olympics filled with little woodland creatures that avoid the human pulverizing blast, there won't be much of an audience for the games.