The Mejia Saga Continues: the Participant's Perspective

Mejia, displeased with our decision to not remove the post, has responded again with a more detailed retelling of his adventures in Florida. Away we go:

Yepum, We Dun' Get'em

Arrowhead stadium. 2:00. KANSAS STATE VS IOWA STATE. FARMAGEDDON! 

Sure, this is a battle that can only be compared to that of the autobots and decepticons (Can't stop the Transformers references). Why? Because they're both fucking gay. The two teams that will be duking it out in a lightly attended Arrowhead stadium on Saturday are the two lesser schools in their state. Enjoy the unforced fumbles and the arant passes during the game. It will be a shitfest. But when FARMAGEDDON comes around, the main attraction isn't the football, but the pregame activities.

Friday Afternoon Substance Abuse: Semain Trois

This is a weekly blog that compares the likes of college football and addictive drugs, and then rolls it into a tight little blunt I like to call the Friday Afternoon Substance Abuse. If you don't know what the hell I'm talking about, then clearly you have participated in some Friday morning substance abuse. So get ready to sit Indian Native American style and stare at a bookshelf for 3 hours cause it's time to drop some acid.

For all you non french speakers, Semain Trois is french for 'week three'. Hey, look at that, it is indeed the third week of the College Football season. Like our new graphic? No? That's funny 'cuz as I look at it, all I can see is a Saturday night for Bubb Rubb, and nights with Bubb are awesome. 

Know what else is awesome? Mixing cough syrup, speed, and Hawaiian punch. It's an amazing combo for anyone looking to flirt with asphyxiation and or death. It is a memorable 18 minutes, though, while you verbally abuse your sofa and punch your blender. This concoction has other suitable uses as well, like as a metaphor for really hot football teams, like say.....the U.

Remember when I said earlier that both Florida teams in the ACC were going to blow. What I really meant was to say is that any Florida team with a racist mascot is going to blow. When I picked Georgia Tech as ACC winners, I didn't take into account the fact that Miami has a black quarterback. I don't even know what I was thinking. HE'S BLACK. We might as well Lou Holtz (jump to irrational conclusions) this one and line them up against Florida. Black man versus Jesus 2.0. That would be fun, as long as you pregame with an aerosol can.

See. He's calling for your Tebow. HE'S BLACK!

Friday Afternoon Substance Abuse: Week DOS

Hola hombres! It's officially week two of the best sport going on right now, and guess which anti flip-flop/shorts/hat/drinking campus is going on a crack binge this week. That's right, your favorite Mormon college, BYU. Somehow misogyny has actually improved the play of athletes. Who knew this was possible (cough Shawne Merriman cough). So Ya'll (that's how you say it out there right?) get your baking soda 'cuz crack is on the main menu this week.