Live Blog Time!!!

This is our new liveblog system. If you'll notice, you can join in. Definitely do this, and also be funny. We can control what goes on down there, so don't be too racist, but a little racist is encouraged.

Dick Vitale Writes?! - John Cheatapari

For those who have never heard of Fire Joe Morgan, then you should be ashamed. They created a blog just for the act of reading between the lines of poorly written baseball stories. Since they have shut down and moved on to bigger things, there has been a hole in the blogosphere for readers to revel in the idiocrocy that is mediocre sports writing. Doing my part to fix this, I have decided to take up where they left off, and give Dick Vitale what he has been needing for a long time -- someone to bring him down to earth.

Today's Article: Calipari matches Rupp for best start. 

Wilt in italics.

Dick in bold.

When John Calipari looked at his early-season schedule, he had to feel that the three-game stretch against North Carolina, Connecticut at Madison Square Garden and at Indiana was going to be a bumpy road.

Like driving over a road constructed of great blue whales. 

Bobby Knight: Regular reader of the Perm?

As you know, if you are loyal follower, I have a viscous and life shortening hate towards John Calipari. I have stated it more than twice, and yet the media has made no comment. Surely, a blog with the massive readership this one does should have the capability to bring up ideas that result in reasonable questions. I'm like Glenn Beck. I'M JUST ASKING QUESTIONS. Also asking questions, albeit months later than I was, is my newest favorite retired basketball coach/announcer Bobby Knight.

John Calipari's Daughter Still Can't Evade Stalker

Erin Calipari, the lesser of the two Calipari daughters (as seen in the picture to the right), continues to experience a mysterious email invasion. She updated her Facebook status a few weeks back in an initial attempt to convince the person to cease and desist. A few days ago, Erin reiterated her message with a hint of sarcasm and I'm-funny-because-John-Calipari-is-my-father wit.