September 10, 2010
Mizzou does it again.
I know this seems to be a recurring segment, but ratting on Missouri is my best attribute. Of course other than my average sized penis which make women say "ok". This video came to my attention via Deadspin. Let's just do a rundown through some lines here.
First, that wife beater, no matter how fitting it is that is on a Missourian, is much to small. This means hiphopster. Also, douche.
Second, get a fucking ihome. This isn't 2001 asshole. MP4's bitches. GO KU.
Third, this campus is shit.
"We don't need a practice field, this floor is our turf." Too poor to have a practice field? And, as far as I know, volley ball is only played on court surface or sand. No in between bullshit like grass. Save that for field hockey.
"Let me start off by sayin' (said in the middle of the verse) I know it's volley ball but it's not a game we're playin'" No? It isn't? You don't play volleyball? How bout pin the tail on the Mizzou girl? It's like pin the tail on the donkey. Let me rephrase that. It is pin the tail on the donkey.
"If you're in our path then we'll cut off your lights" That right there sir is a misdemeanor.
Something to notice is the underage-edness of the cheerleaders. This is customary of many Missourians. Break em in early. Make them all late.
"It's safe to assume that Katie's gonna put it down ... BOOM (ejaculation)."
Oh look. The tiger is eating blue and red shirts. NOOOO. GOD FORBID THEY PUT THE TWO MOST POPULAR COLORS IN THE MOUTH OF A BRASS TIGER.
And then of course a money shot of a tiger fucking two girls on a tiger. SO META!