March 27, 2010

Drinking games - Elite 8 (1)

Last night brought another great night of basketball. LaceDarius Dunn got it Dunn. Tennessee helped send Evan Turner back home, and secure his spot as the two pick in the draft. Duke beat Purdue (ho hum). Michigan State beat those honkies around. So that leaves us with eight very crappy teams and no story line whatsoever.

But that also leaves us with only one solution for the filth left in this tournament. Drinking copious amounts of alcohol for these games. What's that? You live in the West coast and the games today start at 1:30? I'm sorry I didn't know I was catering these posts to vaginas.

Today, drinks all around for every Layup/dunk for the underdog, and take a drink for every three made by the favorites. Also, every time you see Luke Wilson, drink as well.



–Jacob Pullen drains a three = two drinks plus the one already allotted above
–Gordon Hayward pivots = one drink
–Shot of Frank Martin staring down one of his players = 2 drinks
–Mentioning of the "athletic" differences = 2 drinks
–Dennis Clemente turns the ball over = 3 drinks
–By the graces of God, Butler upsets K-State = commence hysterical crying and finish drink.
Grab some Captain fans. Imma swerve in the lane


–Bob Huggins is in his sweat suit = 5 drinks
–Mention of John Wall as the best freshman in the nation = 1 drink
–Shot of Ashley Judd being a slut or just acting normal = 3 drinks
– Shot of both coaches cheating and or placing bets on the game = 89 drinks
–Mention of West Virginia's Big East tourney victory = 3 drinks
–West Virginia takes out the last remaining Wildcats in the tournament = breath sigh of relief and GO TO THE BARS AND CELEBRATE!

March 26, 2010

This is Madness... THIS IS DRINKING GAMES - Sweet 16 (2)

Night two of drinking without restrictions but with guidelines that make sure your liver will fail to support you past 40. Tonight has some good games ... for drinking. They all suck entirely sober, but once alcohol is added, maybe you can pull yourself to liking a team. Nah. Cheer for Evan Turner or something. These games are just a shitbin of depressing. You can blame Northern Iowa for that one. Michigan State and Kansas would be good. FUCKING PURPLE TEAMS.

This time you drink one for every foul committed by the favourites (I'm European now) and one for every tournover (EUROPE) by the underdogs.

I look like a raptor. HISSSS!

–Mentioning of Evan Turner as player of the year = 2 drinks
–Bruce Pearl is wearing his orange suit = 5 drinks and 2 if it's just and orange tie
–Wayne Chism's head band falls off = 3 drinks
–Mentioning of the '07 Ohio State team = 4 drinks and finish the case if they mention Greg Oden's penis
–Tennessee wins = Sing "Rocky Top" and drink for every missed word from the song.

Enjoy my agony ... assholes

I had been meaning to post this earlier but I kept pushing it off, like my suicide attempts. Day six and still no suicide. Appears I might just make it.

K-State is such a buzz kill.

Shame on you K-state. You just took out the second most exciting player in this tournament. Assholes you are. How dare you make Jordan Crawford leave the tournament. Other than Lacedarius Dunn, there is no more exciting a player. Why is that?


You tell me if he doesn't give a fuck. End of regulation three from 4 feet behind the arc. SILK. End of first overtime three from 10 feet behind the arc. SILK AS FUCK. And if he hadn't been quadruple teamed at the end of the second overtime, I'm sure that one would have been bottoms then as well.

But all that is null now thanks to the Wildcats. Thanks for taking out the only person who has ever dunked on Lebron that plays for Xavier. Assholes. 

March 25, 2010

This is Madness... THIS IS DRINKING GAMES - Sweet 16 (1)

Why just watch a game when you can WATCH a game. That's what we strive for here at the Perm, enhancing the enjoyment of college sports. So, in an attempt to get some joy out of watching a bestteamless basketball tournament we add the best ingredient known to man. OXYCOT..wait.. ALCOHOL!

You love drinking, we love drinking, and therefore we present to you our round of sixteen drinking game for the Thursday games. Please enjoy, and don't drive, unless you want to HAVE FUN! (seriously we don't condone it fuckers.)

With all games, a two point shot made for the underdog is a drink and a three by the overlords is a drink. This way you get shwammered like a true frat guy. Speaking of douchebags.


  • Reference to Arinze Onuaku's knee = 1 drink
  • Shot of Jim Boeheim not happy at Scoop Jardine = 2 drinks
  • Douche announcer talks about Butler going to hometown for final four games = 2 drinks
  • Douche announcer disrespects Butler's athleticism, but really means they are all whitey McWhitewhites = 3 drinks
  • Gus Johnson screams something = drink at your discretion 
  • Butler upsets Syracuse = FINISH YOUR DRINK

March 24, 2010

Who wants some Dawker?

So as I was sitting here, minding my own business and watching a nice episode of SouthLAnd, that was specifically picking on the USC football program, when I ran into a surprising shot. This shot was so awesome that I said "Should I post this?" and then continued that statement up with FUCK YES.

Enjoy AJ.

Evidently changing one word in the url constitutes use legally. It would be great if TNT just called us Herm's Worm.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fack.

I'm just going to start off with a notice that this post will have nothing to do with the game. The game is what it was. We lost. We should have lost. The better team that day won. That is it. This is just for the people who think it's the greatest thing to see the Jayhawks lose in such an unappealing fashion.

It's not. It's the worst thing that can happen to the people of Lawrence. A campus shooting (which would most likely be started by me shoving an AK-47 down the throat of a chinese exchange student that doesn't know when to SHUT THE HELL UP DURNING CLASS) would be less depressing than this loss. When you see the kids fall to the ground crying, don't tell them to stand up and stop being a pussy. It is the end of the world for them. We don't take kindly to our black people failing at the one thing they can do well.

March 23, 2010

Welcome all, if you're still there....nope.

We've been on an extended retreat for the past few weeks here at the Perm. You might actually think that we forgot about the thing entirely, but that's not true. Just Bubb has. As for me, well, get ready. Make sure you're sitting down, and have a non erect penis, because erected is what it's going to be in just a second.

We are making changes in a general way to help you differentiate us from the KSK's and Lowposts of the world. This is because we haven't had a ton of traffic and haven't had a whole lot of response to our blogging topics, and due to our busy schedules, it's hard to find a topic that is Perm worthy. 

So, to help us in our quest for funny shit that you will enjoy, for your viewing pleasure we have decided to become strictly a College Sports HUMOR BLOG!!!!!!! :). This is because we are in college, and our closest love of sports resides in our colleges. Now, when we say strict, we don't mean in the Catholicism sense, we mean more of a, just don't abort the baby and you'll be fine meaning. 

We may venture into NBA draft stuff (sniffles, makes a memorial in closet with voodoo Sherron Collins) and NFL from time to time because it's college stuff really. Also, we (I) will begin doing things that are college oriented. No more Chiefs coverage, and as always, no baseball coverage, except for the occasional "look at Erin Andrews at the College World Series, I might just have to drive up there and take her to the Omaha Zoo and do her like a primate in their natural surroundings" from time to time. 

So enjoy and please don't worry. I will be back tomorrow with some stuff. Probably my memorial to the '10 Jayhawks who were brutally murdered by UNI. Fuck you Iowa. Fuck you in your gay ass. GAYS ARE GAY, NOT MARRIED. COMPRENE IOWA?!