February 16, 2010

Everybody Wang chung tonight

Today, in a desperate attempt to bolster their pitching, the Nationals added Wang. Chien-Ming that is. Of course, the Wang jokes were aplenty at the nations capitol today. At the press conference, head coach Jim Riggleman had a few words to ejaculate in.

"We've had our eye out for Wang the last few months of the season," Riggleman said "I'm just glad we satisfied that need now."

Riggleman, who's last name also has it's own joke provoking ability, was glad he could dish out the Wang instead of receive it this time.

"I felt we were catching quite nicely, but the pitching couldn't have been worse." Riggleman said while masking a smile "I think that's a thing of the past now with our new Wang."

The fun didn't stop with the skipper in the Nationals organization. It seeped into every corner of the team, even to first baseman Adam Dunn.

"You know, Natty and Wang don't mix well," Dunn explained "When you begin the Natty regiment, you tend to get an inefficient Wang. Trust me on this one. I know from experience"


Even the 44th president had to get in on the action.

"You know in America... We need leaders... Leaders who carry great loads... And stand upright and attentive under pressure... And I feel the Nationals got some of that with Wang."

Of course, the man behind the deal had some lines written down for the occasion.

"Since the Expos moved here to D.C., we've enjoyed carrying the load on the bottom," Nationals GM, Mike Rizzo said, "But with the acquisition of the new and improved Wang, I see us moving to the top and dominating in no time."

Stephen Strasburg didn't find the jokes as funny as his other National coworkers.

"I'm 21 and I think this is immature."

In unrelated news, Strasburg was sent back down to the minors today to improve on, what Riggleman quotes as, "Something."

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