September 3, 2010

FASA - Friday Afternoon Swig of Alcohol - Week One

It's not new, but I'm photoshop-less so screw it.

This is a sequel to last year's hit blog post. It's like Iron Man II. Much more simple, and dumbed down, but it's flashy as hell. And yes, there will be some ScarJo, as well as other good looking ladies through the weeks. Also, there will be drinking guidelines to the weekends games. I find this much more enjoyable than actually predicting stuff, cause I blow.

To begin, let me explain the rules. There will be a number before a statement. This will represent the amount of drinks you consume at the inception of the even explained. This is generally a reference to beer, but mixed drinks do work as well, and unless you're Joe Namath, probably not a good call to use hard alc. So, with only a paragraph of delay, welcome to FASA - II

FOR ALL GAMES:

1 – First downs.
4 – Touchdowns
7 – Interception

PEW. BEST THROW EVAR

 FRIDAY - 8 pm et - Arizona vs Toledo - ESPN

5 – Any reference about Arizona immigration law.

5 – Lebron James references.

3 – Talk of the Utah game from Thursday.

6 – Utah to the Pac-10 talk.

3 – Toledo makes a field goal.

FINISH A BEER – If Toledo propelles their rockets to a win.





Let me get that knot out of your shoulders.

SATURDAY - 12 pm et - Florida vs Miami (OH) - ESPN

2 – Something about Tebow. (there will be a lot).

5 – Miami (OH) scores in any way.

4 – Mention of Uban Meyer's leave or heart thing.

100 – Talk of Brandon Spikes' sex tape.

FINISH TWO BEERS – If Florida plays like tiny penis-ed people and Miami (OH) wins.



It's the unusual 69 hug.


3:30 pm et - Texas vs Rice - ESPN

4 – Colt McCoy references

3 – National championship reference

4– Gilbert is from Austin mention

7 – "Rice is overmatched" or something to that tone.

4 – Shot of an Asian Rice fan.

FINISH ONE AND A HALF BEERS – If the Owls twist the Longhorns' neck a full 360 and win. 


Poopsie Dasies
7:45 pm et - TCU vs Oregon State - ESPN

4 – Mention of loss to Boise State last year

5 – Comment on TCU's new jerseys

6 – Reference to Obama's step-brother who coaches at OSU

2 – Obligatory non-BCS school reference

4 – Heisman talk for Jacquizz Rodgers

FINISH HALF A BEER AND GO OUT AND DRINK YOUR HEART OUT – If Oregon State kind of upsets TCU.



8 pm et - North Carolina vs LSU - ABC

1 – Mentioning of a name of one of the suspended players on UNC

4 – Reference of LSU's terrible offense last year

6 – Reference to UNC basketball

3 – LSU's chances in the SEC

5 – Talk of agents and NCAA rules.

7 – The total score exceeds 30

FINISH YOUR DRINK – If someone wins. Then end you're night at a bar and or party.



SONG THAT WOULD RANK #1 IN THE BCS RANKINGS FOR THIS WEEKEND.



HERM SPERM FOR THE WEEK – SCAR JO AS PROMISED EARLIER.





















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