September 1, 2010

Preseason Partying and Bullshit - Pac 10

The Pacific 10 holds the title of most uncared for conference, and rightly so. Their west coast time zone relegates all their games to 9 pm start times in the east coast. By that time, people are already drunk looking for a hookup. 9 pm football games on a Saturday night might as well be an Iranian league soccer game. Therefore, no one cares about this conference. Also, it is just assumed that USC will win the conference, and everyone knows, the human spirit feeds of intrigue, and not expectations. That's why they went out and got good old Utah for the bunch. Intrigued NOW BITCH???!?!??!?

Oregon has a five finger discount policy on campus.

USC athletics doesn't use a wallet. The money just sits around in their pants, and if SOMEHOW, someone finds a few dollars that isn't supposed to have those dollars....JOE MCKNIGHT I SEE YOU.

Stanford produces sex addicts. Proven fact, by Stanford researchers.

UCLA gets to play K-state this year. The battle between the two lesser important schools in their state.

Arizona's A stands for alcohol.

USC plays Dillon Baxter. The world jizzes over themselves. He's considered for a Heisman but gets the Adrian Peterson treatment. USC wins the conference, and doesn't go to a bowl game.

Ducks are fucking assholes.
Stanford goes to the Rose Bowl as the second place team. USC bitches about it. No one cares.

Oregon steals a game @ Stanford but gets beat by USC.

Oregon State looses to TCU and Boise State, completing the worst ever scheduled season ever. Dumb asses.

Washington and Jake Locker play well and finish third. They become depressed because they wanted first place. They then shoot themselves with a shot gun after fucking Courtney Love.

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