January 28, 2010

LeBron James: anatomically indecipherable

King James had quite the bipolar game last night. What began as an infantile hissy fit in the midst of a close match, ended with tickling and a giddy sideline jig to celebrate a blowout over a far inferior team. LeBron's demeanor at the end of the match, however, didn't outweigh his decision to douse the front row with water, at least in the eyes of the NBA's Punitive Board. He's just a kid out there, RIGHT SIMMONS?

We're big fans of LeBron here at the Perm, so I won't ever criticize
him unless he joins a women's rights group or something. Contrarily,
we are pretty big critics of stupidity, of which either the NBA or ESPN
has been pretty exemplary. Check out this ESPN bit detailing the
repercussions of LeBron's water distribution incident.

I'm no physician or anatomy guru, but it looked to me like LeKing 
dispersed that tray of water with his big right mitt. My guess is the 
NBA assessed the fine based on hearsay of the incident, since
nobody watches Cavs games when LeBron's on the bench, which
includes the time spent by LeBron walking to the bench.

And if you didn't notice the first time around, re-watch that video
and keep an eye on the woman in the white Cavs jacket who cowers
in the presence of one of James' green projectiles. Classic.

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