August 30, 2009

Great Athletes Should Never be Considered Students. Ever.

For once, I will defend Tim Tebow. Jesus 2.0, if you will, is taking one class as a senior. As one Jew, to an incarnation of another, Mazel Tov.

Athletes like Tebow, especially at public universities, should never be considered "student-athletes." Tebow is a "true" senior - as in, he never served as a redshirt and still found a way to play football and graduate within four years. Matt Leinart, who won 37 games in 39 starts during a three year span, served as a redshirt throughout his tenure as a staple in the USC offense. As a fifth-year senior, it's perfectly acceptable to finish his education with one class. Lane Kiffin approves, and he's a BOSS.

But Tebow...after just four years? Is Florida a bunch of downed syndromes? Yes, they are. BUT, Tebow shouldn't be considered a student in the first place. Enrolling in general education classes about the history of Bill Cosby's Nigerian heritage have little relevance to Tebow's skills as a PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE. Although he chooses to bestow his knowledge upon audiences that could give a fuck less, his primary education is FOOTBALL.

The NFL lacks a system where legitimate athletes, who have no motivation to LEARN AND EDUCATE THEMSELVES, have an avenue to develop their physical skills sans the academic bullshit. AFL? Bankrupt. CFL? Big Brother-Controlled Pussy Shit.

I'm still clueless as to how Tebow is finishing his education in, essentially, three and a half years. Typical educations require 120 credits to graduate, which includes UF. That means in his first 3.5 years, Tebow took an average of approximately 17 credits per semester. Well...if you can juggle that with an Urban Meyer practice schedule and maintain a 3.77, then call me Schiavo and enroll me as a major in family, youth and community sciences.

Any critics of the system need to reevaluate the situation. I will forever be an advocate of athletes who bring their game to the collegiate level for the sole purpose of continuing their education to continue professionally. AS AN ATHLETE. These people have little reason for engaging in the classroom drivel. They are here to become professional SPORTSMEN. Not professional ACADEMICS. Throw footballs, shoot basketballs and hit baseballs. If you can't make it to a professional level, get an education. Yes, that goes for you water polo, soccer, track/field, poker and billiards players. If you're not a member of the latter group, fuck the books, lectures and general intellectual hoopla. It's cockamamie horseshit. Win games for your alma mater and return to donate money to the program.

So Tebow, be proud of your one-class excuse for a senior year. It's one more reason for USC to flaunt its dominance once TRUE FRESHMAN MATT BARKLEY plops his proverbial excrement all over your program. USC over Texas in the Natty. Revenge at the Rose Bowl.

Yeah, I spoiled my Permcast predictions, but only 'cuz there's a surprise for SC fans comin' up this week. Stay tuned.

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