September 5, 2009

Dear Big 12,

You are soft. Like a memory foam mattress. Like the pillsbury doughboy. Like Sam Bradford:


Just relish the look on Bradford's face as he writhes in the pain of his first-ever legitimate sack. I'm sorry, but SUCK IT UP YOU PUSSY. This is what happens when you're fed from a silver-spoon offensive line and are unexpectedly smote by the hat of Joseph Smith

Raise your right hand if you wish you entered the draft last year. Oh. I guess that's pretty ironic.

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